EXETERRPG: (2 - 1602) MS - Civilian Caity Dubois & Counselor Jack Roberts

[Jaclyn Smith]

Mission: Murder on the Exeter Express

Day: 2

Stardate: 2445.12.02

(USS Exeter - Deck 7 - Counsellors office - Civilian Caity Dubois &
Counselor Jack Roberts - 1602)

"Yes please, take a seat." Jack said motioning for her to sit.

Caity did as asked, putting her hands on her knees. Feeling a little
nervous, she didn't realise her fingers were tapping on her knees as she
looked over to him.

"Now then, just to let you know,  this session is confidential. Just to
check on you, see how you are handling the stress. Please understand that
any probing questions are more to see how your stress levels are rather
than any determination of guilt. Is that understood?"

"Yes.. okay." She replied quietly.

"So how has your day been?"

A small laugh escaped under her breath as she took a deep breath, "not
exactly the best day you could say."

“Well, that’s why we are here.”

She nodded slowly, "I know. "

“So, Caity, just start from the beginning. What’s going on in that head of
yours?”

"How long have you got?"

“You are the last visit, you have my undivided attention.”

"Well, I'm prime suspect in a murder that I didn't do, I can't talk to my
girlfriend because every detail will be poured over and this has brought
back some very uncomfortable memories for me."

“Well, let's start at the beginning, why do you think you are the prime
suspect?”

Twisting some of her hair around a finger, something she did when she was
nervous, she looked at him, "Because I told him to tread carefully with the
crew. But it wasn't a threat, it really wasn't.."

“Do you think you treated him unfairly?”

Biting her lip, Caity nodded, "Yes and now I have no way to make it right.
What I said to him was meant to be a gentle reminder to walk softly with
the crew. They're young, some quick to jump to conclusions and may not
have.taken his words in the manner he intended them."

“Why do you think you phrased it in a way that could be taken with
animosity?”

"It wasn't meant that way at all. I chose my words badly. Let emotions get
in the way."

“Why do you think that was?”

"Because this crew are special. They have taken me in when I didn't have
much to offer other than my skills as a bar manager."

"Did he ever threaten the crew?"

"Not that I know.”

"If he never threatened the crew, why would you then treat him with harsh
words?"

"It wasn't meant like that.." Caity replied, "it really wasn't. I meant be
more careful in his manner…" she stopped talking and twirled her hair in
her fingers.

Jack looked at her body language and took notes. “Why do you think you held
so much animosity for him? I’m guessing you would not have said what you
said if you did not hold some discontent with him.”

"Animosity… I didn't hate him. I just saw how he spoke to others and know
that people respond better when you speak nicely. You catch more flies with
sugar than vinegar. "

"Do you think that's a universal? Take Tellarites for example. They would
react negatively to, sugary comments."

"I know. It's a saying that I've always tried to live by. I know that some
cultures don't see it that way but I do."

"Do you think he could have been trying his best to push them to be better
in ways that are culturally appropriate?"

Caity looked down at the floor, still twirling hair around her fingers,
"Perhaps. Now you mention it…. I was wrong."

"Did you have a negative encounter with Commander Tyko?"

"No. He was… his own man. But, negative…. Not really. "

“I see,” Jack said. Reading her body language, he could see that there was
something she was trying to avoid revealing. “Miss, I remind you once
again, this is confidential and is not trying to ascertain guilt in any way
or assign blame. This is merely to see how you are doing emotionally and
mentally. If you choose not to answer, that is your prerogative, but I want
to stress that you shouldn’t be afraid to reveal what you are really
thinking.”

"It's not that I'm afraid. This whole thing has brought back some things
that I hadn't thought about in a long time. I've been in this situation
before. Not accused of murder, accused of something that I hadn't done."

Jack nodded. "Tell me a little bit about that?"

"What's to tell? My… parents blamed me for the death of my sister. So, I've
been accused of things that weren't my fault. So this rodeo is nothing new."

"And so you feel this situation is similar?"

"Wouldn't you? Getting blamed for the death of someone twice over…" Caity
responded,  letting go of her hair and sighing.

"Why did your parents blame you for her death?"

"Because I…. I was with her every day, I left her alone once to get some
air and she ran… a week later they found her…" Caity stopped, wiped her
eyes and looked down at the floor.

"They … if I hadn't left maybe she wouldn't have run. That's what they
thought."

"Why did she run?"

"If I knew that…." Caity paused, wiping her eyes a little and looked at him,

"She ran because she didn't want to deal with her problems. That's what I
think. She couldn't deal and ran."

“The thing is Caity, try as we might, the only people whose problems we can
control are our own. While other people may blame us for the actions of
others, we are only culpable for our own actions, or own doings, or what we
don’t do. You’re needing fresh air doesn’t mean you are responsible for
your sister running away. She made her choice, something she might have
done with you there or not. Commander Tyko being killed might have happened
whether you threatened him or not.”

"I know. It's not the fact that she ran, it's the fact my parents blamed me
for it. But, I get your point."

“But what we can’t do is hide ourselves and our actions, because we think
other people will assign blame to us for things we neither did or control.
It’s not healthy for our psyche.”

She nodded, knowing what he was saying was right. "Sometimes it's not that
easy. I talked to someone before I came here. She made pretty much that
point. But the one person I want to talk to, want to be honest with, I
can't right now."

"Do you understand why you can't talk to them?"

"Of course I do. I know her job is stressful and it means the world to her
so I do understand. Doesn't mean I can't wish that I could talk to her."

“Just for my benefit, in your own words, can you explain exactly why?”

"Why I can't talk to her? Because she's the first officer and anything I
say she would have to report. It's her job. I understand that. I do."

"Does she know about your sister?"

"She doesn't know about my sister and, if this is going to go where I hope
it will, then she needs to know. She should know."

Jack nodded.

"Because hiding things is not the answer. Being angry is not the answer nor
is killing someone for no reason."

"What about killing for a reason?"

"What reason could there be for taking another's life?"

"Well, excluding self defense, many people find justification for their
killings. Even if entirely immoral."

"I… here and now… I would say no. I haven't been put in that position. But
I would say no. I wouldn't ever think to do that."

"Then you have nothing to hide."

"I know."

"So tell me then, do you still feel like you need to hide your true
feelings and give half truths about your encounters with Commander Tyko."

Caity looked at him, "what are you implying?"

"I'm not implying anything."

"Maybe… maybe I am sick of being judged for something that wasn't my fault."

"Miss Dubois. This session is to help assess your mental stress. It's
obvious that there had to have been some kind of encounter for you to react
to him the way you did. As you aren't a rude person."

"There…. Okay, there was a moment…"

"And?"

"He called me out on something. Said that I wasn't being objective in my
role and that i only had eyes for… well, the first officer. "

"How did that make you feel?"

"Upset. I know how to do my job and to have him insinuate I don't…."

"Well did he say why he said that?"

"I don't know…. " caity replied looking down at the floor.

"Don't know or don't remember?"

"I'm sorry… I just don't want to speak ill of the dead."

"I understand." Jack said. "Im going to have you take the next 48 hours off
from work. Take some time for yourself."

"I haven't done that in a long time. I honestly don't know who I am if I am
not working…"

"Well maybe you should find out?"

"Maybe you're right…" Caity sighed.

Jack nodded.

"Am I…. Crazy?"

"Do you think you're crazy?"

"I hope not. I just… I haven't had any time to think about everything…,"

"I don't think you're crazy. I just think you have issues with trust."

"Probably. I need to learn how to let go and trust people. "

"Why not head to the holodeck. Unwind. You need it?"

"I could… to me unwinding involves a fire place and a book."

"What would you read?"

"Tolkien. I could escape to middle earth any day. "

"I think you have a plan."

"Maybe I do."

(Reply none)

(Posted by Will and Jackie)
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